Friday, October 29, 2004

Go Read A Book!

I was driving to have lunch with Collin today and I heard a radio commercial for Blockbuster Video. In this commercial, this woman is complaining that all her friends have abandoned her Book Club for watching movies. Then the announcer suggests she change her Book Club to a Movie Club to get her friends back. Not only does she agree with this but proclaims, "I never liked reading much anyway!"

Big PBBBBBBT!! to Blockbuster for that commercial.

There's not too many more things I like to do more than read a good book. As long as I can remember, I've loved books. When I was little, I had people read to me when I couldn't. In fact, the only memory I have of the night my brother was born was my Aunt Peggy watching me while Mom & Dad rushed off to the hospital and I carried her a stack of books for her to read to me. She didn't want to read all of them but I made her.

When I learned to read soon after that, I read whenever I could. I was always one of the top readers in school and participated in every reading project the teachers threw out.

Both of my grandmas are voracious readers as well, which must be where I got this reading gene. My parents don't read much...Derek hates reading...I just don't understand. In '85 Derek & I spent 6 weeks with my good grandma & grandpa in Grand Junction and I picked up a paperback to read before bed on a whim. It was The Golden Unicorn by Phyllis A Whitney. I stayed up all night reading it and after that was hooked on Whitney's books. Through her I was introduced to Victoria Holt who is my favorite author of all time. Her book The Road To Paradise Island is my fave and I've read it about 4 times.

After a while I veered from historical romance and got caught up in horror. Stephen King, Anne Rice, Dean Koontz, Peter Straub...all favorites of mine.

Now at work since my shift is 12 hours and all I really do is sit around and watch as the machines test my parts, I read every minute of the night. If I'm lucky, I can finish a book a night. Recently I was introduced to Terry Pratchett by Collin and I absolutely adore his books.

So my point is that reading is better than movies!! Reading opens the imagination and expands the mind! More people should do it. Movies are fine, I love movies, but there's nothing better than curling up with a good book!


Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Monkeying Around At Work

Today's post is dedicated to the poor people like me who have to go through the hell of training someone new. Except for Alexis, the girl who trained me. May she burn in Buddy Trainer Hell for being so mean to me!!


So, why do I always get stuck training people that DO NOT KNOW HOW TO LISTEN??? Is it just me? Is there something about my voice that compels people not to listen to it? And if they DO happen to listen, why do they ARGUE? I've trained 4 people since becoming a buddy trainer and 3 of them have tried to argue with me. I need to start carrying a stun gun and when they argue just blast 'em and let them think about it while they're writhing on the ground.


WHY would a Seattle Seahawks fan, whose team has lost the last three games in a row, attempt to talk smack about the Broncos losing to Cincinnati???


Creepy moment of the night: I went to the water fountain last night to get a cup of water. I accidentally pulled out about 10 cups so I sat them on the side of the fountain. The 11th cup fell out of the holder and landed between the fountain and the garbage can. I forgot to pick it up so it was still there when I went back for more water an hour later. As I was drinking, the cup rolled out from between the can and the drinking fountain BY ITSELF and rolled around my foot and to the other side of the trash can, like it was reminding me to pick it up!


People that need to be pimp-slapped: The paper guy that drives like a maniac at 5am while Prescilla and I are trying to take our walk. He whips the papers at our heads and tries to run us down. What is he thinking, that this is a video game or something?


The best thing about work: getting to read. So far this year I've read almost 75 books...yeah, I'm a geek...I've been keeping track month by month of how many books I've read. In May, I read 19 books alone because I read the whole Lemony Snicket series. Right now I'm at 9 books and I'm almost finished with Terry Pratchett's Wyrd Sisters.


Sunday morning at 2am we turn our clocks back...for normal people this is cool - they gain an hour of sleep. For the poor saps that work B shift, we gain an hour of WORK! Instead of a 12 hour overnight shift, we get the lucky 13 hour shift! Bah!


Apologies to Monkey for borrowing his format!! :)


Spoiling The Surprise


It will get you. You won't know when, you won't know where but one day it will
rise from it's watery grave to wrap it's cold claws around you and laugh.
Sometimes it's instant karma but other times it lays in wait, planning.

Years ago when Derek was about 8 or 9, Dad took us shopping at Sears for a
Mother's Day present. At that time, Dad was really into buying kitcheny
gadgets as gifts for Mom so that he could use them. His new thing then was
watching cooking shows like Yan Can Cook and he wanted all their equipment so
he could make what they made, only better. So that particular year, Mom was
destined to get a food processor. We marched straight into Sears and bought
it. Derek was in charge of carrying the purchase.

I don't remember what happened that provoked it but later that afternoon we
were all having a discussion in the kitchen and something came up about our
trip to Sears and Dad tried to pin the blame on his youngest child. Derek
piped up with his defense: "Don't look at me. All I did was carry the food
processor around." Needless to say, Mom was not surprised on Mother's Day.

Flash forward to yesterday afternoon. Place: Graham Advertising where Derek
and Collin work. It was quitting time but Derek was having some fun throwing
the football around the art department at unsuspecting victims including his
wife Heather who was there to pick him up and yours truly who was just there to
see Collin. While tossing the old Nerfskin around, Derek announced that for
their upcoming anniversary, they were going up to Fort Collins to watch the
Eagles, the minor league hockey team, play. I said that sounded like fun and
Collin added, "Yeah, and they're staying at a bed & breakfast."

Suddenly, Derek's face clouded into one of disbelief and betrayal. Heather
started jumping around hollering, "He told me the secret! He told me the
secret!" Seems that the B&B was indeed supposed to be a surprise for Heather
but when he told Collin about the arrangements he negelcted to tell him NOT TO
SAY ANYTHING TO HEATHER!! Collin felt really bad.

Heather did say, however, that the brouchere for the B&B had come in the mail
that day so she had pretty much figured it out but still....

Karma. It WILL get you. You better watch out!


Monday, October 25, 2004

Holding A Grudge

I've mentioned before that I love horror movies. I love the rush that you get when
your heart starts pounding because something jumps out unexpectedly. Even if I know
it's gonna happen, I still find myself flinching. I've only screamed out loud at a
movie once and that was with The Others at the very end. I've only ever tried to
push my way through the back of my seat in an attempt to get away from the
"creature" once and that was in The Ring when the girl was climbing through the TV.
But I have NEVER been compelled to NOT watch what was happening.

Until this weekend.

I saw The Grudge.

Oh. My. God. It scared me so bad that I spent 3/4 of the movie either with my eyes
closed, my hand splayed in front of my face watching through my fingers or intently
studying the pattern of the word "PRECIOUS" that was stitched on my t-shirt. I have
never been to a movie that scared me so bad! I never wanted a movie to be over that
badly, either. I was simply terrified.

The plot was thin but the terror was so much that you don't notice it. There were
the requisite unexpected jumpy things but on their own they were scary. None of that
"hand that suddenly reaches out and it turns out to be her boyfriend" stuff. Nope.
Seriously scary stuff.

I went to see this with Collin and his 11 year old son Justin. Collin watched the
whole thing, eyes wide open. Justin and I were closing our eyes, looking everywhere
but the screen. Later on we both admitted to each other that we were so scared we
almost started crying!

So, if you're looking for a good scary movie to see this Halloween, go see The
Grudge. But don't say I didn't warn you!


Thursday, October 21, 2004

Frosty The Golfer

Derek has mentioned before that he was in Cub Scouts. Mom was his den mother so it was her responsibility to find fun things for these boys to do...places to go, crafts to make, things to learn, yadda yadda yadda. One year she decided that the scouts needed to go miniature golfing.

This was easy to plan because at the time Dad worked for Western Golf (geeze...was that the name of it? It's been so long...). They not only had a clubhouse and a driving range but a cool western themed miniature golf course. All she had to do was call Dad and set the whole thing up. Everyone was looking forward to it.

I guess this is the time that I mention that while I was not a Cub Scout (being as I'm of the female persuasion), I always hung out at the meetings and tagged along on their little trips. There was this one kid that would follow me around and snap my bra all the time. Needless to say I started avoiding him!

Soooo...the day arrived. We woke up to SNOW! I think this was in October so we weren't expecting snow at all. But there it was in all it's Colorado glory, at least 3 inches of it! We were all pretty couldn't play miniature golf in the snow! But Mom persevered. She hauled us all out to Western Golf and got us all balls and clubs and made sure we all had our coats and gloves and hats and, despite Dad making fun of her and all of us, we trekked out to the course.

At the first hole it became pretty obvious that we weren't going to be able to play a normal game of putt-putt. The snow was too wet & thick for our little colored balls to plow through. So, do we give up? Hell, no! We're Cub Scouts!! Well, at least a Cub Scout's sister. Mom went around the holes, dragging her club through the snow from the tee pad to the hole, making a path. I don't know how many holes-in-one there were that day - Derek says he got one. But that was the most memorable game of miniature golf EVER!


Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Losers Love The Lord, Too!

One of the reasons I actually don't mind coming into work is because I have a
really cool supervisor. Nancy's funny and goofy and actually knows what she's
doing. She likes to talk; I've run into her in the hallway and ended up
talking to her for almost an hour when I should have been working! One of the
things she talks to me about is her "other job."

She's a pastor for the Nazarene church. In fact she was a member of and
sometimes preached at the Nazarene church at the end of the street that I lived
on for 20-some years! Talk about coincidence! One night when she had to come
pick me up for work cuz my car was dead, I just said, "Pretend you're going to
church. You'll see me on the side of the road before you get there."

Anyway...she also sings in the choir. One Sunday, she said she was singing
away, looking out at the congregation and saw a guy flashing an "L" against his
forehead with his finger & thumb. Smiling, she did it back to him and then
wondered why suddenly everyone look shocked & scandalized.

After church, the guy came up and said that he hadn't been doing that to her,
but just as a joke to one of his buddies in the choir and that he hoped she
wasn't offended. She didn't know what to say...she had no idea what he was
talking about. He explained that that was the universal symbol for "LOSER."

"Ohhhhh! I thought it was 'L' for Lord!"

They always say ignorance is bliss. I think they're right!


Monday, October 18, 2004

Raider Hater For Life!

Aw, yeah! The Broncos beat the Raiders! They didn't just beat the Raiders,
they SPANKED the Raiders...they WALLOPED the Raiders...they CRUSHED the
Raiders! Whoooooo! Rueben Droughns is so my new hero! What a stud, crashing
through that so-called run defense! Warren who? Wheeeeee!


Sunday, October 17, 2004

I Love Sleep!

Sleeping is actually one of my favorite things to do. It's relaxing and you
never know what you'll dream about. I've noticed throughout the years,
however, that I am a very deep sleeper at times. I slept through a tornado
once when I was little...apparently the sirens were going off and the storm was
just amazing and I missed it all, peacefully sleeping in my bed.

When I was in 4th grade which would mean Derek was in 1st, he had contracted
pnuemonia. It was a really bad strain and he woke up in the middle of the
night not able to breathe. My parents called 911 and dispatched 3 fire trucks,
the paramedics and a sherrif to our house. This was about 1:30am, I believe.
They all arrived with their lights flashing and their sirens blaring. They
worked on Derek in the living room which was adjacent to my bedroom,
administering oxygen and shouting out orders to others EMT's and reassurances
to my parents and to Derek. Then they popped him on a stretcher and carried
him off to the hospital. He was released a few hours later and came home, sick
with pnuemonia but fine otherwise. Alive, thank God.

And there I was, sleeping through it all! Every bit of it! I never woke up!
It was a shock to me to find out what had happened when I woke up? Derek went
to the hospital? There were fire trucks and ambulances outside? How did I
miss all this???

But I did have a dream where my friend Sandi was showing off her new perm in a
room with flashing red lights. The lights were distracting me. So I wasn't
totally oblivious, I guess. My subconscious knew something was up!


Friday, October 15, 2004

Yeah, I wish!

You're Brigitte Bardot!

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


But Why Is All The Rum Gone?

pirates of the caribbean

!!**_WHAT_MOVIE_R_U_FROM_**!!with Pics
brought to you by Quizilla

So I went back to the Quizilla thing. I don't care what Derek says.


Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Preventing Burnout

I've mentioned before that one of my job titles at work is the illustrious one
known as "BUDDY TRAINER." People here take that position seriously. Manage-
ment expects all us buddy trainers to go to special classes throughout the
year to successfully deal with other people, motivate the trainees, etc etc.
Tonight was a 2 hour class on "Preventing Buddy Trainer Burnout."

I KNOW I suffered that when I was training Stan. And we have a new lady
starting in a couple of weeks who I might have to train so I figured this would
be a good class to attend...that and it was mandatory* but anyway...

It was a good class overall. Interesting at times and much better than sitting
there handtesting all night. We were given a packet with all the tips and
tools needed to overcome BT Burnout such as relaxation, exercise, laughing,
massage. At the beginning of the packet was the following exercise that I
wanted to share with you. Try it now:

"Picture yourself near a stream...
Birds are softly chirping in the crisp, cool mountain air...
Nothing can bother you here...
No one knows this secret place...
You are in total seclusion from the world...
The soothing sounds of a gentle waterfall fills
the air with a cascade of serenity...
The water is clear...
So clear that you can easily make out the face of the person
whose head you're holding under the water.

There now. Feel better?"

Yeah. That's how I feel sometimes!


* Since this class was mandatory for every buddy trainer there were a ton
offered throughout the month of October. I chose the 10pm class tonight just
to get it over with. All the other BT's had chosen later dates. I told my
supervisor that I didn't want to go by myself so she went with me. By the
time 10pm rolled around, Nancy & I and one other lady were the only ones in
the class so Nancy called the other 4 buddy trainers from my floor and had
them come to the class. Ask and ye shall receive! Whooo!!


Tuesday, October 12, 2004

Greetings From The Green Ninja!

I was blind about an hour ago but I can see again, thanks to my Ninja Powers!
Actually, the truth is I wasn't blind but I sure felt close. I'm at work and
my job tonight is to visual every single piece of a 140,000-some part lot.
EVERY STINKIN' PART!! This is hell on the eyes, let me tell ya! I started out
just looking bare-eyed at the part, checking to make sure the lot number was
correct. This lasted until I got off the phone with Collin* and I realized
that I would lose my sight in a matter of minutes if I didn't get to a
magnifying lamp forthwith!

Have I mentioned these parts are small? No? Well, they are. 2 of these parts
can fit lengthwise across my pinky nail. So there ya go. That's why I was
having problems. I would visual a bundle of 20 rails (97 parts per rail) then
I would transfer the parts from the yellow tubes to clear tubes. See, the
yellow tubes are just a teensy bit shorter than the clear tubes and don't work
in the handler that we test these parts in, causing jams and flying parts.


But a little bit ago, Ginny, one of the few people here that I actually like,
came over and offered to transfer the parts after I visualed them! Yay! My
eyes and my sanity are saved!!


* Collin called tonight and right away Jordyn asked to talk to me. She got
on the phone. "Hello."

"Hi! What are you doing?"

"I'm the Black Ninja!" This is said in a sly whisper.

"The Black Ninja?"

"Yeah! I'm black on my feet and my hands..." Collin informed me later that
she was wearing black socks on her hands and feet.

"Cool. Are you a good ninja or a bad ninja?"

"Good. I'm fighting the Red Ninja who is bad. That's Daddy." She talked a
little more than got off the phone by saying, "Bye, Green Ninja. That's you.
You're the Green Ninja. You're good, too, like me."

I realized later that if you put Collin & I together, we're The Christmas
Ninjas. But since Collin is bad he's in charge of delievering the coal to the
bad boys & girls. I deliver sweet things like dolls and trains.

So all bow before the good & powerful Green Ninja and her repaired eyesight!
And have a good day!


Friday, October 08, 2004

At Least I'm Posting

You're a Winter. You very much enjoy your time
alone but do like other people's company
sometimes. You just need your space. You have a
few priviledged friends who saw past your
colder exterior to find the true you. You can
have pretty bad mood swings (though you hate to
admit it) so you could be soft one second then
storming around the next! But over all, you're
a very pleasant person once people take the
time to get to know you. You're a good friend
for in-depth talks. You're very talanted when
it comes to creative things.(If you can't see
tje pics, go to my homepage and look near the
bottom and find your result)

What season are you? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

I like this picture. I think it's pretty. This might be my last Quizilla post but you never know.


Thursday, October 07, 2004

Look At Me!!

Your beauty is FUN!!! Man, you really don't CARE
about the way you look because it shouldn't get
in the way of you having a good time. You love
being around lots of people and are very
friendly too. Your beauty tends to be very
ordinary at first but your care-free nature and
contagious laughter make you very appealing.
You've got great verbal skills and your sooo
easy to get along with because not only are you
quite understanding and compassionate but your
light-hearted about things as well. You don't
get under stress that much which helps you keep
up your perky personality. Your beauty can be
characterized by a laugh.(If you can't see tje
pics, go to my homepage and look near the
bottom and find your result)

What kind of Beauty should you have? (girl) (PICS)
brought to you by Quizilla



You are a Return of the Living Dead Zombie. You
were brought back from the grave by exposure to
245-Trioxin. You crave the heavenly taste of
spicy brains to stop the pain of being dead.
You are virtually indestructible, as even
burning you up will create Zombie Rain and
raise more zombies.

What kind of Zombie are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Shaun Of The Dead wasn't an option, sadly.


Play It Again

I always thought I was Lucy...I guess not!

You are Schroeder!


Wednesday, October 06, 2004

I've Got The Music In Me

I can't do math to safe my life. I truly believe that it's not a genetic thing
but a side effect of my having been a graduate of Widefield High School.
When I was in 10th grade, all the sophomores were put into the same level math
class for 1/4 of the first semester. Then all students with a B or higher were
moved to Algebra II Trig. When they informed me that my B & I were being
upgraded, I told them I didn't want to go. I didn't have a great grasp of math
and Algebra II Trig sounded too difficult. Their response was "You'll only be
hurting yourself if you don't go."

So I went. I failed. I actually carried a D all the way through until I
bombed the final and ended up flunking the class. I blame the teacher...I
can't even remember her name but I do recall that she was a short round mean
thing with a bowl-cut hairdo. She never offered after-school assistance and
even when it was obvious by my homework and tests that I wasn't getting what
she was teaching, she just let me sink. When I went to get my schedule for the
next school year, they had placed me in Advanced Math! I mentioned it to the
lady that gave me my schedule that I had flunked Alg II Trig...why was I in
Advanced Math??? "Because that's the next step up from Alg II Trig, honey."

"But I FLUNKED! Failed! A big fat F on my report card!" It took my mother in
there explaining to them before they changed me to Algebra III Trig. That was
just a redo of II and with a different teacher in Mr. Jones, I got an A. See?
I told you it was the teacher!

Anyway...back to me flunking punishment for failing was no music
until I got my next report card which wouldn't be until October sometime!! A
whole summer with NO MUSIC!! How would I survive? There was so much great new
music out there...Motley Crue's new album was one I distinctly remember was
slated for release that summer...Bon Jovi, Cinderella, was torture.
Even when we went somewhere in the car, Mom kept the radio off.

I complained to my then best friend Rhonda about the situation as we sat in her
room listening to the radio. Her mother knew about my punishment so we had to
keep it low. Anyway, Rhonda took matters into her own hands and introduced Mom
to Stryper, the religious heavy metal band. Rhonda made her read their lyrics
and talked her into letting me listen to them. But only them. And maybe some
classical music, that wouldn't be too bad.

So I did chores around the house (laundry all summer was also part of my
punishment for the F) and earned money to go buy some Stryper tapes. They
weren't all that bad...I still really like the songs "Honestly" & "Lonely."
But after a while of that being ALL you can listen to....I was getting

During a trip to Sears (when they still sold music),Mom & Dad went to look at
vacuums or something boring, Derek went to the electronics sections and I
stayed in the music area. I found Bon Jovi's "7800 Degrees Fahrenheit" tape.
It was on sale for $10 and I happened to have $12 on me. I grabbed the tape
and ran to the nearest checkout line. I know I must have looked incredibly
suspicious glancing around furtively the whole time the sale was taking place,
watching for my parents or even Derek; if he caught me I would have had to have
bribed him in some way to keep him quiet ("Goodness gracious, great balls of
fire!"). Luckily wasn't caught and I got the tape home safely. It's still
one of my faves to listen to.

At some point that summer, we went to Grand Junction. I had my Walkman with me
for those stretches of road where we ahd no radio reception. Mom wasn't that
cruel to not let us have music during that 6 hour trip! But as soon as the
station was gone I popped the headphones on and listened to a special tape that
Rhonda had made for me. Every other song was Stryper in case Mom happened to
hear any music but the other stuff was Motley Crue, Cinderella & Bon Jovi. At
one point Mom looked at me and said, "I sure wish there was a way I could
listen to your music." I just smiled. I knew I'd be in the biggest trouble if
she could! I also remember that Derek & I were playing marbles in the
(haunted) basement and I had the headphones on & he heard "Girls Girls Girls"
coming from the earpiece and threatened to tell. I lost some good marbles in
that bribe. :(

I somehow made it through that summer only getting caught once - I had taken
the old portible radio and placed it under my pillow to listen to the radio
while I fell asleep. During the night my pillow slipped to the floor and my
head was right on the radio. That's how Mom found me when she woke me up. I
don't think I was in too much trouble, though. I think she must have known how
hard it was for me to keep away from music! But I got my report card, had an A
in math and everything went back to normal.

Including the fact that I still can't do math!


Monday, October 04, 2004

Dreaming In Sync

This past week my dreams have been very vivid and pretty bizarre. I had one
yesterday where a co-worker's car tookoff by itself and crashed through a fence
but I was the only who cared, including the guy who's car it was! His reply
was, "Enh. I'll take care of it later." When I told him about the dream last
night he laughed and said "Well, what else could I do with it?"

But today's dream was just cool. I think. Some others may find it amusing or

I was sitting with Collin and I was thinking about his past career that he
never talked about. I finally got up the nerve to ask him, "Y'know, I was
wondering why you were so scared about singing at karaoke when you used to do
that for a living when you were a member of N'Sync?"

"I just sang in the background. I never sang lead," he replied.

"But you had to be good to actually be in N'Sync, right?" He shrugged. We
stopped talking about it but I didn't stop thinking about it. I knew it was
something he didn't like to have brought up. I also kept thinking that I
wished my friends could see me, dating an ex-member of N'Sync!! It wasn't like
Collin was Justin or Lance or Chris...he was COLLIN, a 6th member of the boy
band. AND I kept thinking that Collin was keeping a low profile being a
graphic designer rather then all the "in-the-spotlight" things that the other
N'Sync guys were doing like movies and solo albums.

So that was my dream. I think I've admitted in previous posts that I really
like N'Sync. If I haven't, there it is in black & white. I like them so I
thought that dream was pretty nifty! It also made me want to listen to them
when I woke up but their CD's are still in storage. Bummer.

When I told him about the dream, Collin suggested that it means that he's doing
car ads when he's really destined for greater things. I think he could be


The Darndest Things...

Derek told his buddy Sean (who just recently started blogging) that because
he had kids he would never run out of blogging material. I am a firm believer
in that kind of mentality as well. My numerous posts about Elena, my friend's
daughter, can attest to that. But lately I've been watching Collin's daughter
Jordyn on my days off. I don't think there's been a day yet where she hasn't
said or done something that's made me think, "I could blog about that."

Thursday afternoon, Jordyn & I were on our way to pick up her brother Justin
from school. For some reason, she started talking about people having babies.
I asked her if she had a baby of her own, would she rather have a boy or a
girl? "A girl," she answered right away.

"What would you name her?" I'm a big freak on names...I love names, knowing
what they mean, why people are named what they're named...blah blah blah...
(My name, for instance, is Scottish and means "flowering weed." Yay me.)


"Jones what?"

"Just Jones. That's a nickname for Jordyn, didn't you know that?"

"No, I didn't know that."

"Don't you think that's pretty?"

"It's...interesting," I replied, wondering where a 4 year old comes up with
this stuff. But then she surprised me even more.

"If I had a baby of my own, I would have to get Mommy & Daddy to change the
baby's dipeys cuz there's no way I could handle that on my own!"

"You know, when you DO have a baby of your own, YOU have to change the diapers.
I don't think Mommy & Daddy are going to help you." I heard a heavy sigh come
from the back seat as she digested this information.

"Fine then. I'll just hold it over the toilet."

"But..." By this time, I'm trying not to laugh too terribly hard. I AM
driving, after all. "Little baby's can't talk. How would you know when he had
to go potty?"

"Oh, I would know! I'll just hold it right over the toilet so I won't need
dipeys at all!" She was so pleased with herself and her solution to the
dipey-changing problem that I just let it drop. The vision of her holding a
poor naked baby over a toilet, however, is permanently etched in my mind!


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